CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
DREW
As Drew watched Mel and Jason leave the club, she looked around at everyone else. Everyone was silent. She
set her sights on Kevin. "Kevin! What the hell is that guy's problem?"
Kevin looked bewildered. "Believe it or not, I've never seen him in a fight before. He really is a good guy. I'm just as surprised as everyone else is."
Taylor's voice was the next voice Drew heard. "Thanks a lot for the back up there, Ike."
Immediately, Drew looked around for Zac. He and Kate were nowhere to be found. Had they missed the entire exchange? Surely not, they'd said bye to Mel. Drew was kind of surprised that Zac hadn't jumped in on the action. If he was anything like he used to be, he was capable of starting his own physical fight with Jason and they would have gone rounds. Zac wasn't exactly known for taking crap and he wasn't afraid to tell you like
it was. Drew instantly shook the visual out of her mind.
"Hey," Ike said to Tay, interrupting Drew's thoughts. "Like I said from the beginning, I'm not in this. If he had started pounding on you, I'd have jumped in. But you were okay, you seemed to be holding your own there."
"Someone had better tell me what in the hell is going on here," Natalie suddenly piped up. "What are you 'out of' Ike? And Tay, what the hell did you do outside? There is absolutely no good that has come out of anything that has happened here tonight. You're making this trust thing very difficult for me!"
Tay looked at her, astonished. "What the hell are you talking about? Trust thing? You practically fell all over yourself when he asked you to dance!"
"I was flattered!"
"You are drunk!"
Natalie shut her mouth for a second to comprehend what was going on around her. Drew noticed she was a little unsteady on her feet. She smiled to herself.
"Listen," she started again. "I am allowed to have my fun. I am allowed to let loose once in awhile. I am in New York City on a Saturday night and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you spoil it. If you don't mind, I would like to continue this little party somewhere else. I am LEAVING!"
At this moment, Zac and Kate approached. "Leaving?" Kate asked. "Already?"
"We're going out. Just us. Like an after party," Natalie told her. "It's time to get the hell out of this godforsaken place."
Kate shot dirty looks all around the board. "Okay," she said to Natalie. "Sounds like a plan." Then she looked up at Nikki expectantly. "Nikki?"
Poor Nikki looked so uncomfortable. She looked from Drew to Kate then finally gave in. "Um, okay. I'm coming. Sorry, Drew."
As Drew accepted Nikki's apology, Ike stood up. "Well I guess I better tag along. Not a good idea to leave three
ladies alone in the middle of the big city." He hugged Drew. "It was so great to see you. Thanks for tonight."
"It was good to see you, too," she said back to him. "Take care of yourself."
"Nat!" Taylor was saying to get his wife's attention as she left the club. "Natalie!" Drew watched as she ignored him.
"Drew," Kevin said from behind her. "Hey, I hate to leave, too, but my date just showed up. Thanks for letting me tag along. And I'm sorry about Jason."
Drew smiled appreciatively. "Thank you. It really wasn't all that bad."
Before she knew it, she found herself alone with Taylor and Zac. Tay let out a breath and sat back down, his head in his hands. Drew sat beside him. "What in the world was tonight about?" she asked him.
"I don't know," he said. He laughed a small laugh. "That seems to be my motto lately. Natalie is so damn pissed. I can't seem to control my actions. I just don't know."
"Tay, you can't just walk back into her life and expect her to just automatically fall at your feet. If that's what you were hoping would happen then you're sadly mistaken."
"I know," he said. "I know. I thought I could handle this friend stuff. Thought I finally had my shit together, but then I saw her tonight and everything just went to shit." He looked up at Zac and then back at Drew. "I don't see how you two handled it."
Zac shifted his weight nervously and Drew blushed. "Let's just say we got our frustrations out early."
Tay smirked at her.
"Well it hasn't been easy on us, either," Drew continued. "Situations like ours are unusual. It's just up to us to decide how we're going to handle them." Drew glanced up and caught Zac's eye. He looked at the floor.
Tay sighed. "I just need to get out of here. Go back to the hotel. Think..."
"You wanna share a cab?" Drew asked.
"No thanks. I need to be alone for a bit. Besides, I'm sure you and Zac have stuff to talk about." As the three of them stood to leave, Tay got Drew's attention. "Drew?"
"Yeah?"
"Where'd the guy come from? What's up with that?"
Drew shrugged. "It was a blind date, pure and simple. First time I ever met him, too."
"Blind date? They act like they've known each other for awhile."
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Tay, she hasn't been on a date since well before her husband died. To be honest I'm surprised at their chemistry, myself. But there's a whole lot you still don't know. If I were you, I'd probably can the whole 'Oh my god I miss you' act and maybe really try to get to know her again. It has been ten years, you know. People change."
Tay stared at her in silence for a moment. "It's that bad, huh?"
"Kinda, yeah."
Outside the club after Taylor left in his cab, Drew and Zac finally found themselves alone. Zac grabbed Drew by the waist and pulled her close. "So how friendly are you feeling?"
To Drew's own astonishment, she felt herself get slightly annoyed by the question and she pulled away. "Not very, actually."
Zac looked at her, confused. "What's the matter?"
"This whole night was absolutely weird. I mean, with your wife there and all the crap that went on. It was all just really awkward. I didn't like it."
Zac shifted his weight nervously. "Well, yeah. I admit, tonight was a little strange."
"It was a mistake. I don't think it's a good idea for us to try to be one big happy family. Trying to force us all into situations we shouldn't be in. I think friends should be friends and family should be family. They don't always need to go together."
"Yeah, but Drew--what are you saying?"
Drew was frustrated. "I mean I don't need to be all 'besties' with your wife. We don't like each other. We never will. Shit, Zac, she hated me before she met me! I'm all for 'let's be friends' and shit, but this is ridiculous."
"Drew, you know how I feel about you. And I think we should use this time wisely while we're alone."
Drew was suddenly realizing that she harbored feelings and resentments she didn't know she had. "Yeah, I know how your dick feels about me, Zac. I have no idea what's going on up here." She motioned to her head.
Zac looked hurt. "I thought we were cool earlier. Where is this coming from?"
"I'm just--I don't know. Too much crap going on, too many emotions. I just need to be alone. Maybe Tay had the right idea tonight."
Suddenly Drew's handbag fell out of her hand and hit the ground, spilling out all of the contents all over the sidewalk. Zac bent down to help her pick it all up. "So when do I see you again?" he asked.
"Whenever I see you, I guess," was her response.
"Drew, come on--"
She hailed a nearby cab and opened the back door. "Just go back and get in bed with your wife." Then she closed the door behind her and the cab took off down the street.
_______________________________________
If I wait for summer to begin
I may never begin myself
If we look to another for our dreams
They may never become our own
There's a story every girl will shape
And a journey every boy must take
Sing it if you know it
Scream it if you feel it
There's nothing standing in your way
Follow along with me
Scream And Be Free
If you're always living for tomorrow
You're gonna miss right now
If you're only looking in the mirror
We'll never see ourselves
Raise your voices
Singing one more song
We will not be here for too long
Raise your voices
Singing my anthem
Make your mark before we're undone
Sing it if you know it
Scream it if you feel it
There's nothing standing in your way
Follow along with me
Scream And Be Free
MEL
Mel and Jason had opted to walk back to Mel's place. He had looked at her shoes and asked if she was sure she wanted to walk. Her response had been that if they found themselves in close confines at the moment, she would have torn his clothes off with no apparent regard for their environment.
He had accepted her answer and now they walked, hand-in-hand, down a quiet street in New York City.
"Look, I'm sorry about back there with Taylor," Jason's deep voice cut through the late night air. "I know he's your friend or whatever and I was kind of out of line. I almost broke his pretty face, though. Seriously. If he'd have kept on with his mouth, I'd have done it."
"Well," Mel said, searching for a response. "I'm sorry for the entire night. I'm sorry you ended up in the middle of all this crazy mess. You didn't deserve that."
"I'll admit it was pretty crazy. I mean, I totally didn't mean to lose my shit and all that, but--there's only so much I'm willing to sit around and watch go down."
"I slapped him, you know."
Jason looked down at her, amused. "You what?"
"That's what happened outside. I slapped him. He really didn't do anything. We were talking and he said some things I wasn't ready to hear. Emotions took over and I slapped him. I kinda didn't mean to, actually..."
Jason chuckled. "Wow. I'm gonna have a lot of fun with you."
Mel smiled up at him flirtatiously. "You have no idea."
The pair walked in silence for a couple more minutes before Mel spoke again. "So...Jason. What's your name?"
He laughed at her. God he was so gorgeous when he laughed. "What do you mean? You just said it."
She smiled. "No, I mean what is your NAME? Like 'I'm Melody Bradshaw, nice to meet you.' What's your name?"
He shook his head in amusement. "My name is Jason Kamealoha."
Slowly, Mel repeated his name. "Kamealoha...Jason Kamealoha...has a nice ring to it. What does it mean?"
Jason challenged her. "Why does it have to have a meaning?"
She suddenly felt embarrassed. "Uh, well, I just figured since--"
"What does Bradshaw mean?"
Mel felt defeated. "Touche."
He laughed and pulled her closer to him. "I'm just kidding with you. Kamealoha means 'the beloved one.'"
She smiled up at him. "That's nice. 'Jason The Beloved One.' I mean it seems a bit pretentious but it's nice."
He smiled at her. "Well then go for it, Bradshaw. Dazzle me."
She shrugged. "I dunno. It's not my maiden name."
"Ohh," he said, nodding in mock understanding. "So then dazzle me with your maiden name."
"Oh it's not nearly as beloved as yours."
He let out a deep, hearty laugh that seemed to echo through the night. She smiled at him. "Try me," he
said.
"It's boring old Banks. That's my maiden name."
Growing more serious, he said to her, "It's not boring. It's a beautiful name."
Mel scrunched her nose up in disgust. "You're a horrible liar."
"I'm completely serious. It's beautiful because it's who you are."
Mel was dumbfounded. She wasn't sure she'd ever heard a more beautiful statement in her entire life. 'I should have married into some damn culture,' she thought to herself.
"Uh, look," Jason said, breaking the silence. "I just want to say that I'm really glad I got to meet you tonight. I mean, aside from all the obvious sexual tension." He smiled at her, deviously. "I don't want you to think that I'm some...player or anything. When I say something, I mean it. My word is very important to me."
Mel smiled. "Well I appreciate that. A lot. As long as we're being honest...you're the first date I've had in a
long time. A really long time. Um, please don't let that scare you off. I swear I'm not some crazy cat lady or something like that."
He smiled at her, that gorgeous, bright smile that made her melt. "I don't think that. I know you've been through a lot."
Startled, Mel stopped dead in her tracks, her hand still in his. She turned to face him. "What do you mean you know I've been through a lot? How much do you know? How do you know?"
"I KNOW," he repeated. "Your friend is pretty talkative."
"Did you--did you know about me before you came over? Is this, like, a charity thing? A pity date?"
"No, no. Nothing like that," he said, pulling her close to him. He held her face in his hands and looked her in the eyes. She was putty in his hands. "I mean, yeah, I did feel a little sorry before we came over, but then I saw you and none of that mattered. I never gave it another thought. I know you felt the fireworks the second we laid eyes on each other." He moved his lips closer to her ear. "I told you already. I'm not in the habit of saying things I don't mean."
He pulled away and she stared up into his eyes. There was meaning in them. Truth. She was instantly calm.
Without another word, she took his hand and they began walking again. Changing the subject, Mel said, "I noticed the tattoo on the inside of your arm earlier. I like it. What is it?"
She saw him glance down at his arm. "Oh, that one is a wave. Represents my mana."
"Your mana?" Mel asked.
"In Hawaiian culture, it is believed that certain objects or places have their own life forces to them. That certain forces and power can be drawn from them. My mana is water. Or the ocean, more specifically. Like I am one with the ocean, for lack of a better term. It's who I am."
"Hm," Mel said. "I don't have any tattoos. I wouldn't even know what kind of tattoo to get."
"That's because you don't know who you are yet."
Mel walked in silence, contemplating. This man was just full of fascinating information. What started out as strictly primal, carnal attraction--which, make no mistake, was still there--had now grown into something else. She saw him as a person now. She liked him.
He broke her silence. "I live in Hawaii, you know. I catch the plane to go back home tomorrow night. I was only in town for the weekend visiting with some buddies. Just, uh, thought you should know..."
"You know," Mel said, ignoring the disappointment she found herself feeling at that statement. "I have to say, I've never really met a Hawaiian with green eyes before. Well, I haven't actually met a lot of Hawaiians, but still. None with green eyes."
He leaned over and said in a half whisper as if telling her a secret, "That's because I'm only half Hawaiian."
She looked up at him. "Oh, really? Well you're just full of surprises."
"You haven't even learned the half of them."
Mel laughed seductively.
Finally at the Brownstone, Mel unlocked the front door and Jason followed her inside. Once inside, she had just dropped her keys in the bowl on the table by the door when Jason wasted no time grabbing her and
planting his second hungry kiss on her lips.
Letting all inhibitions fly out the window, Mel anxiously grabbed at his shirt and pulled it over his head. She gasped and stared in wonder at his bare chest. He was so beautiful in his caramel skin, he was almost untouchable. His arms and torso were carved out about as much a torso could be carved. Complete with six-pack abs, pecs to die for and rolling hills of biceps, Mel found herself in complete sexual overload. He was no longer a mere man. He was her prey.
As she kissed him, her hands quickly felt for the belt of his jeans and nimbly went to work on it. However, before she could get anything accomplished, his large hands suddenly wrapped around both of her wrists.
Caught off guard, Mel's eyes darted to his in protest. Slowly and seductively, he placed her hands at her sides and proceeded to lightly tug the one sleeve of her dress down and squatted low in front of her, gently pulling her dress past her waist and let it fall to her ankles. When she had gotten dressed earlier in the night she had absolutely no idea that she would be having sex tonight, nor did she have the intention. She was now glad that she had opted to wear no underwear.
As she stepped out of her dress, she became immediately aware of her pistol which she had strapped to the inside of her thigh. Once again she had completely forgotten she had it on her and wanted to die of embarrassment as she remembered Taylor freaking out over it when he discovered it on her the previous week. She wanted to crawl into a hole.
She felt the blood rise in her cheeks as she began to apologize. "Oh my god," she said. "I am so sorry." She swiftly began to grab at the strap to remove the gun when, once again, Jason, still squatted in front of her, stopped her hands and placed them back at her sides.
The sight of the gun had absolutely no affect on him. He hadn't even flinched or acted surprised. He took the strap from around her thigh, dropped it in the floor and then took the pistol in his hand. He ran the side of the barrel of the pistol gently up her thigh, then across her abdomen and then slowly up to her stomach. She sucked in her breath in anticipation and her heart raced about ten million miles per second. He then continued to run it between her small breasts and across her shoulder as he stood, running it half way down her arm before gently laying it on the foyer table beside the bowl that contained her keys. Never once breaking eye contact.
It was the most erotic thing she had ever experienced.
He then leaned down and wrapped one arm around her waist letting out a primal, aroused growl as he hoisted her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as she entangled her hands in his hair and hungrily kissed and
teased his neck.
She hadn't uttered a word to tell him where her room was but miraculously he had found it on the first try. He carried her with ease, through the doorway, slamming the door behind him. Savagely, he laid her down on the bed and began to work on his belt. Once he was fully undressed, she found him just as impressive, if not more, below the waist than he was above.
He repositioned her on the bed and she didn't object. She was so turned on, she allowed him to do whatever he saw fit with her. But not for long. That familiar, predatory instinct was beginning to take over and she was more than ready to show him what she was about.
________________________________________
DREW
Drew was pissed off when she finally came home from the club. She was pissed off at Zac because she felt he was holding back on her. She was pissed off at the fact that she had to go all the way back to the club because she had lost her ID only to find that it was not there and, in turn, had to stand around and file a report for it. Finally, she was pissed at herself for not being able to find the source of her sudden change in mood. She had
wanted nothing but Zac earlier in the night. What the hell had happened?
She walked into the dark Brownstone an entire hour after she had first gotten in her cab to leave. A ride that should have only taken about ten minutes but was disrupted by detours associated with her lost ID.
Drew didn't bother to turn on any lights. She didn't care. She was tired, hurt, and stressed out and all she wanted to do was sleep. She went straight to her room and changed into her favorite pajama pants and her favorite ratty t-shirt. She cleaned the makeup off her face and crawled into bed, setting her phone to a James Taylor playlist to help soothe her to sleep.
It didn't take long for her to doze off. She was obviously exhausted. She had been asleep for about ten minutes when Fire and Rain was interrupted by the sound of her text alert. Sleepily, she looked at her phone and saw a text from Zac. "Come to the door."
She wasn't sure she was reading correctly as her eyes were still asleep. "What?" she texted back.
"Come to the door. Don't want to ring bell or knock in case Mel is asleep."
"She's not even home."
"Come anyway."
Angry as she was, curiosity and astonishment got the best of her. He couldn't possibly be at her house!
She rubbed her eyes and headed to the front door. She hesitated before she opened it. She should text him and tell him to go away, she thought. But she knew better. She knew she couldn't resist him, no matter how
upset she got. She opened the door.
Sure enough, there he stood. "Zac!" she said in a loud whisper. "What the hell are you doing here? How did you find me?"
He smiled slyly at her and flipped her ID in his fingers as if it were one of his drum sticks. "Swiped this when it fell out of your bag."
She snatched it out of his hand. "How dare you! That is so despicable! I had to file a report because it was missing!"
"I'm sorry. I am. But you refused to see me and I found an opportunity so I took it."
"Where's your wife?"
"Still out."
She looked at him skeptically. "Seriously?"
"Seriously! Have I ever lied to you?"
He had a point. Despite everything they had ever been through, present times included, he had never lied to her. She had to give him that.
"Can I please come in?" Zac asked.
Reluctantly, she let him in and he closed the door behind him. Still dark, Drew stepped on an odd piece of fabric under her bare feet. "What the hell? she said, turning on the lamp on the foyer table.
Drew and Zac looked around in shock. "I thought she wasn't home!" Drew said in a loud whisper. She and Zac spied Mel's dress under the foyer table, the strap that held her pistol under Drew's foot, Jason's white t-shirt thrown over the chair across from the foyer table, and Mel's pistol and keys on the table beside her.
They looked at each other wide-eyed. "Holy shit," Zac said. "That's a sex tape I would probably pay to see..."
Drew laughed and hit Zac on the arm. "What?" he said. "I'm not gonna lie, I wouldn't kick him out of MY bed."
She rolled her eyes at him. "Come on," she said. She led him to her bedroom.
Closing the door behind them, Zac's expression turned serious. "Look, Drew. We really do need to talk."
"Okay," Drew said. "Talk."
Zac sighed and sat on the bed beside her. "Um, okay. I'm kind of in a difficult position here. You and I, we've always been...free...we never had a care in the world about anything. We were together and we were happy and that was all that mattered. Right?"
"Right," she agreed.
"Right. Well, I haven't really been that person for a long, long time. I mean I'm married now, I have kids. And...I've never cheated on Kate before. Never even thought about it. Not once. And then you...come back into my life and it's like I'm an entirely different person. A different version of myself. And I miss that person and I miss you and then at the same time I love my wife and--I can't be two different people, but that's how I feel. I feel like I am two completely different people and I don't really know how to get a handle on it. Drew, I don't want to lead you on or make any false promises to you. I can't sit here and say that I'm ever going to leave my wife because I don't know what's going to happen. But the heart wants what the heart wants and
right now the heart wants you. Tonight. Drew, I have nothing to offer you but right now."
Drew sat in silence for a moment. "I understand your situation. The position you're in. I do. And I want to respect it, but the truth is, I feel exactly the same way. I'm trying to figure my feelings out too, but it's so difficult. See, I still live in the moment. When I see you or talk to you I feel like we are the only two people that exist in the world. That's the connection we have and that connection is strong. I can't sit here and tell you
that I'm going to carry on this elicit affair with you, but I can't promise that I won't either. Like you said, the heart wants what the heart wants--"
"I can't stay," Zac said.
"I know."
"You are so sexy right now."
"I look like a train wreck."
"It's fantastic."
And with that, Zac took her face in his hands and kissed her. Drew's heart raced as he laid her down on the
bed and in one swift movement, pulled her pants off of her and tossed them to the side. He removed his own shirt and positioned himself over her, kissing her neck and sliding his hand up her shirt. As he teased her nipple, she moaned with pleasure and began leaving open-mouthed kisses over his neck and shoulder.
Drew's hands drifted until the found the top of his pants and without any trouble, she had his pants unbuttoned and unzipped. As her hands brushed across she could tell that he was more than ready for her.
After they were both undressed, Zac laid Drew back on the bed and he lowered himself between her legs. Grasping the sheet in one hand and a handful of Zac's hair in the other, she arched her back and moaned in ecstasy. She looked down to watch him work and with a quick flick of his tongue she threw her head back on the pillow and moaned louder. He was so damn talented and she was very quickly losing control.
Not ready to come yet, she made him stop. They met each other on their knees in the bed and Drew kissed and teased every part of his body as she had her hand around him below the waist, keeping a tight grip. When she began slowly stroking him, Zac sucked in his breath. "Oh my god," he groaned. "Drew, turn around."
Drew quickly turned around and assumed the position and he entered her from behind. Drew's breathing instantly turned rapid and was turned on even more at the moan Zac released as he realized how tight she was. He started slow with her, enjoying how it felt until Drew was so worked up she decided she didn't have time for it anymore. "Harder," she urged him, watching him from over her shoulder.
Zac did as instructed and they both moaned with pleasure. "Shit, Drew," Zac's breathing was harder and more rapid. "Oh shit."
"Harder," she urged him through clenched teeth. "Do it, don't hold back."
Obliging her, and himself, he took her aggressively until she came and then he followed soon after.
Out of breath, Drew turned over and looked up at Zac. He soon collapsed on top of her and gently kissed her. "We gotta stop meeting like this," Drew said.
Zac smiled. "Do we?"
She smiled back. "You know us."
Suddenly they heard Zac's phone go off. "Shit!" He got out of the bed and looked for his phone. When he found it, he looked at Drew. "It's Kate. They're on their way back to the hotel." With a pained look in his eyes, he said, "God I feel like an asshole, but I really gotta get back."
Surprisingly, Drew found that she didn't mind. For some reason, the idea of Zac as a one night stand pleased her and she wasn't sure why. She sat up in the bed with the sheet wrapped around her. "One of these days we may be able to talk for five minutes after sex."
"I'm so sorry," he said as he buttoned his pants and looked for his shoes. "Drew I--"
"It's okay," she said, smiling. "I get it. I'm just glad I got to have you when I did."
She dressed herself and walked him out of the bedroom and to the front door. He kissed her one last time. "I swear to you I'll call you."
"I know you will. And if you don't, I know where to find you."
He laughed. "Yeah, that's true."
As she watched Zac bound down the front steps, she closed the door behind him and leaned against it, staring into her living room. She spied Mel's dress and Jason's shirt, gathered them up and dropped them in a pile in
front of Mel's bedroom door on the way back to her own.
__________________________________________________
MEL
Mel flipped her long, dark hair back away from her face, biting her bottom lip and enjoying the look on Jason's face as he enjoyed himself. He held her hips tight as she rode him and she rode fast and hard. She couldn't help herself. She was even more turned on at the fact that she found herself in complete and utter control--something that hadn't happened to her in quite some time, besides the act of sex itself.
She could feel herself coming. She hadn't wanted to yet, but she wasn't able to help herself any longer. One more look at Jason and his gorgeous body and it was all over for her. As her moans became more rapid and quick, he began to encourage her in a savage voice that came from deep in his throat. "Mmm, that's it," he
whispered. "Come on. Come on, baby, you got it. That's it..."
And then it was over for her. She collapsed into his neck and groaned her release eagerly into his ear.
She returned the favor and held him down aggressively as she rode him until he came. When it was time, she took his mouth in hers and thrust her tongue into his mouth as she felt him buck underneath her. He growled into her mouth as she kissed him and she didn't break the kiss until his moans subsided.
Catching her breath, Mel rolled off of him and laid there beside him. "Holy shit," Jason said, wiping sweat off his forehead with both of his hands. "That was so hot." He looked over at her and smiled. "I completely underestimated you."
She smiled back, pleased with herself. "I may be little, but I pack a lot of punch. Especially when it comes to
something I want."
He laughed in disbelief. "You know when I first saw you, I was like, 'Yeah, I got this.' But then you go and--damn!"
Mel giggled. "You thought you had what?"
"I don't know. I guess I pegged you for typical."
"Typical? How often does this happen to you."
He smiled at her shyly. It was the first time she had ever seen him blush all night long. "Not often, actually," he said. "Actually, not really at all."
Mel was shocked. She turned her head to get a better look at him. "Really. I mean, for you to look the way you do. You don't have at least two or three women per week?"
"This isn't really my thing."
Mel opened her mouth to protest, but he put a finger over her lips and smiled. "But there's that rare occasion where when sparks fly, you just can't ignore them. And damn if you aren't a little firecracker. I swear I got hard the second you turned that corner. It was the damnest thing. It's not like I was out 'looking to get laid' when Kevin talked me into this date."
"Talked you into it, huh?"
"Well yeah, it was a blind date. How did you feel when you found out about it?"
He had a point. "Well you got me there."
Jason grinned at her and turned over, pulling her close to him. "You know what else I got?" he whispered. He glanced down his body and back at her.
"No fucking way," she smiled.
He slid his fingers between her legs and began talking dirty into her ear as they prepared to go for round two.
_________________________________________
Mel awoke to the sunlight invading her room. She didn't know what time it was and she didn't really care. She lay there on her side for a moment and dared not to stir because she knew that when she turned over, Jason would already be gone and last night would have been nothing more than a dream.
After a moment or two, she did stir as a leg cramp started to kick in. She turned over to reach for her other pillow when, to her shock, she found Jason there sound asleep.
She was surprised to see him and took a minute to study him like the work of art that he was. How a man like that had ever given her the time of day was beyond her. He slept on his back, the sunlight shining on his rich, Hawaiian skin, which seemed to glow against the white pillows and white covers she kept on her bed. One of his muscular arms rested behind his head, revealing another small, black tattoo hidden under his bicep. His
head faced opposite from her and his long brown hair subtly splayed out against the pillow. He looked so peaceful it was like witnessing a dream.
Not wanting to wake him, Mel gently let herself out of bed. She tiptoed to her bathroom and looked in the mirror at the horror before her. She thanked god above that she was able to escape before Jason woke to this
monstrosity. She ran a brush through her tangled mane and wiped excess makeup off of her face that had gone astray during their wild night. She brushed her teeth and finished freshening herself up.
She had come through the doorway and back into her bedroom and had begun silently rifling through some clothes to find something to throw on, when she heard Jason's sleepy voice from across the room. "Hey, what are you doing?"
She looked over at him as he sat up in the bed, naked from the waist up, the rest of him covered by the white comforter. 'Goddamn,' she thought. 'He even wakes up sexy.' Was there anything about him that didn't turn her on?
"Uh, I was just gonna put something on real quick."
"No, no," he said. "Come back here. Don't put anything on."
She obeyed and crawled back under the covers with him. He wrapped both of his arms around her and pulled her close. They lay like that for about a minute when Mel said, "I didn't peg you for the cuddling type."
"Are you kidding, I'm a teddy bear."
"You're something," she said, jokingly.
He answered quietly. "So are you."
Mel turned over so she could be face to face with him. They lay on their sides, looking at each other. She moved a strand of hair away from his face. "I hate that you have to go back to Hawaii so soon."
"I don't HAVE to do anything," he responded. "I'm a free man. But I am kind of homesick and I want to get some time in before I take off again."
Mel sighed in agreement. "Yeah. I just went home recently, too. Didn't realize how much I missed it until I was there."
"Where is home for you?"
"Tulsa, Oklahoma."
He smiled. "Oh, a Midwest girl, huh? Should have known you weren't a true city girl."
"Just a wannabe," she said.
"So was your ex there? When you went back home, I mean?"
"Unfortunately. There are just some things that are better left in the past but they just won't seem to go away in the present."
"Sometimes that's when you know if it's meant to be," Jason said softly.
Startled by the statement, Mel stared at him. "Huh?"
He propped his head up on his hand and looked down at her. "Um, listen, I'm not really looking for a relationship. I mean, work is really piling on right now. I have a couple of films and a couple of TV shows that I have to do some work on. I'm booked up solid for the next year and a half, at least. I can't handle the commitment right now. I hate it, but I love what I do."
She smiled softly at him. "Trust me, I'm not stranger to that. It's okay."
"Mel, I don't want to hurt you."
"I'm not hurt. The truth is, I'm not sure if I'm ready for one, either. I mean, you're amazing and I really like you, but--I'm not exactly in a place to be in a commitment myself."
"You know, we came into each other's lives for a reason," he said. "Everything happens for a reason. The reason may not be apparent for years down the road, but it's there."
She smiled. "I could believe that. What do you think my reason for coming into your life is?"
He looked in her eyes and studied her face, caressing her arm lightly. "I don't really know, yet. I know virtually nothing about you but at the same time I feel like I know your soul. It's kind of strange, actually. I feel calm and comfortable around you. Like I can be myself, you know? But I can't really answer your question right now." He smiled. "Give it some time and get back to me."
Mel was amused. "Get back to you, huh? So I'll hear from you again? This isn't some love me and leave me situation?"
Jason laughed. "Dammit, woman. I can't decide if you're paranoid or if you're challenging me. Of course I want to stay in touch with you. We can't have a connection like ours and lose touch. Are you crazy?"
She giggled. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm just one of those people who just can't live their lives with unanswered questions."
"Life isn't something you live," he said. "Life is something you feel. If you aren't doing what you feel is right, how are you living? This time we spent? That was right for us, in the moment. You can't let your past or what your future might hold dictate your right now. If you feel it, do it. That's the only way you'll ever truly know."
Mel stared at him in awe. "Know what?"
"Everything."
His words hit her like a ton of bricks and Taylor instantly entered her mind. Jason was right. She had spent so much time resisting Tay that she never paid attention to her own feelings or what she wanted. For her to find emotional relief she had to pinpoint what she truly wanted, difficult as it may be to attain.
Desperate to push Tay out of her mind for the time being, she kissed Jason. Returning her kiss, he moved himself on top of her and kissed her deeper. After a couple of minutes, she stopped kissing him. She smiled at him. "So, you've known me for embarrassingly less than 24 hours now," she said. "Judging by what little bit you know, what do you think my mana is?"
Jason laughed lightly. "I can't tell you what your mana is. Nobody can. That's personal to you."
"Well I don't know much about mana and I'm not Hawaiian, so. IF you could tell what my mana was, what would it be?"
"Music," he said. He didn't think about it. He didn't hesitate. It rolled right off his tongue.
Mel was startled. Her entire life had revolved around music, in more ways than one. She spent her entire life singing, then the Hansons came along and now she was a music critic. It was a little-known fact that she
even wrote a few songs as well. Her life revolved around music. For him to say music was her mana without ever knowing any of this about her absolutely stunned her. She had no idea what to say.
Finally, she managed to choke out, "Uh, can music be mana?"
"I don't see why not. Mana is like a spiritual energy that lives in something. It could be anything."
"Why music?" she prompted.
"Because that's what I feel when I'm with you. Music is dynamic. It's diverse. It's full of many different meanings. Music makes you feel things. Different things. Everything. Music determines who you are. You are music."
She must have had one hell of an expression on her face because Jason started laughing. "Well I'm no expert," he said. "You can tell me to fuck off or whatever, it's okay."
"Did you know I'm a music critic?" she whispered, barely able to get it out.
He immediately shut up and looked in her eyes.
"I'm a music critic," she repeated. "I review music. All kinds. For a living."
Suddenly, she attacked him. She didn't know what it was. She couldn't stop herself, the urge took over and she absolutely had to have him. Right there and now, as the morning sunlight flooded into her room.
As urgently as she had kissed him, he stopped her and pushed her away. "Wait, wait," he said.
"No..."
He brought his face closer to hers. He spoke to her quietly. Gently. "I want to take my time with you this time. To really pay attention to all that there is of you. Please take this slow with me."
She heard herself gasp a little. She didn't really care what he said at this moment, she just wanted him any way she could get him. She gave in to him without a fight.
____________________________________
After they made love for the last time---well, as they made love for the first time, as making love was hardly how you would describe the night before--Jason used her shower and then prepared to leave. "I
actually didn't mean to spend the night," he said. "But I'm glad I did."
Mel smiled, tying her robe around her. "I'm so sorry you didn't get much sleep. I know it's going to be brutal having to catch that flight with so little rest."
"It's not a problem," he smiled. "I'm so used to it. I sleep like a baby when I fly.
They exchanged contact information and he kissed her one last time, wrapping his arms around her tightly. "I am so glad you ended up as my date last night," she said. "I'm going to miss you."
"Me, too," he said. "Don't be a stranger. And, uh, maybe...maybe when my work lets up some next year and if we're both still single...maybe we could try to take this a step further."
She smiled. "We'll see. Only time will tell."
She shut the door behind her when he left and leaned against it and sighed. She spotted Drew looking at her expectantly from across the room. Mel giggled at her. "Did you know that you're the best friend in the world? Like ever?"
Drew was amused. "Well, then. Someone is perky this morning."
Mel smiled. "That was the best sex I have ever had in my entire life. Ever. And not just because I haven't had sex in...god I don't even want to say it. It was the BEST. All. Three. Times."
Drew was beside herself. "Three times?? Holy shit! Details!"
"Later," Mel begged. "I desperately need a nap."
"Mel! Come on!" Drew said.
Mel walked past her and into her bedroom. She didn't even take off her robe before getting into bed. She didn't realize how exhausted she was until that moment. She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
She guessed she must have been asleep for a little over an hour when her cell phone rang. She wanted to ignore it but then she thought it might have been Jason, so she fished it out of her handbag on her night stand and let her eyes adjust to the caller ID. She didn't know how to feel about the number she saw on the screen. It was Taylor.
Reluctantly, she answered. "Hello?"
"Hey, Mel, meet me for coffee."
Mel was instantly annoyed. "Well good morning to you, too, I wasn't asleep or anything. Just sitting here waiting for you to call."
"Shit, Mel, I'm sorry. That was rude of me. Please meet me for coffee."
"Tay," Mel groaned. "I need to sleep."
"Please. I only have a few hours."
Mel sighed and gave in. "Fine," she said. "Give me twenty minutes."
Hastily Mel showered and threw on a pair of skinny jeans, a t-shirt, and a pair of gray, suede, stiletto, ankle boots. At her vanity she threw her hair on top of her head in a messy mass. Instinctively, she reached into her small keepsake box and retrieved the necklace that held her wedding rings and began to put it around her neck.
Ready to clasp the necklace, she stopped and stared at them through the mirror as they laid on her chest. She remembered what Jason had said. "Don't let your past or what your future may hold dictate your right
now." He had said that you feel life, you don't live it. At that moment, in her right now, she felt like she would be okay without her wedding rings. She would never forget John, and she would always love him, but now was the time to finally let him go. It was time to open her eyes with a fresh outlook on life. Time to start over.
It dawned on her. That was the reason Jason had come into her life.
Finally, she threw on a hoodie and a pair of large sunglasses to hide her exhausted eyes and headed for the door. On the foyer table she spied her pistol. She reached for it and then stopped herself. Was it really that necessary to have it on her after all? She opted to leave it alone and went out the door.
Mel arrived at Lavazza in Union Square five minutes late. Taylor was waiting for her on the corner. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw him. After last night, and this morning, she seemed to see him in a whole
different light. It was almost as if her entire outlook on life had changed. Like she saw him through brand new eyes. She felt liberated.
"Hey," Tay said, nervously. "Thanks for meeting me."
"Where's Natalie?" Mel asked.
"Uh, asleep. She had a pretty rough night last night."
Mel simply nodded in agreement.
"So, uh, I haven't ordered yet. Thought I'd wait on you."
Mel scoffed. "Oh, so we're actually having coffee."
Tay narrowed his eye at her. "I asked you to meet me for coffee. What the hell else are we gonna do?"
Mel didn't answer him. Instead she followed him inside the coffee shop in silence.
"What are you having?" he asked her when they got to the counter.
"Oh it's okay. I'll get it."
He acted annoyed. "Mel. Why are you constantly being so difficult? Just let me buy you a damn cup of coffee. Black, right?" he said as he turned back to the counter and placed the order.
Mel couldn't help but smile to herself when his back was turned. Back when they were together before she didn't even drink coffee. Now he had hit her preference right on the head without ever even knowing. She knew it seemed kind of trivial, but it touched her nonetheless.
They picked a table outside and sat across from each other. "Listen, Mel," Taylor started. "I want to apologize for last night. The whole night was just completely insane and pretty much an all-round bad idea. "I kinda lost my head a little bit. And I'm sorry."
"I'm not," she said.
He looked surprised. "You're not?"
"Tay, what has happened in the past--what, 14 hours?--has probably been the closest thing to a spiritual experience that I have ever had."
He furrowed his brow. "This is totally not the direction I expected this conversation to go in."
"Jason opened my eyes to a lot. Made me see things in an entirely different light."
Tay rubbed his face. "I really didn't want to talk about the Incredible Hulk today."
Mel sipped her coffee and scowled at him through her sunglasses. "Just shut up and listen. It's not even like that--"
"Did you sleep with him?"
"Tay!"
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. None of my business."
"Anyway, he said some things to me that at first I thought were just sweet sentiments and such but after I got to thinking about it, it was like my head suddenly cleared and I could see the light," she said matter-of-factly, her voice still groggy from lack of sleep. "Basically, life is too short to dwell and worry. It is. I have spent so much time, maybe even too much time, grieving over John and wallowing in my own self-pity. I miss him and I always will. This morning is the first morning I have ever left my house without my wedding rings. Or my pistol. And it's weird and it's gonna take some getting used to, but it's right. It feels right. He told me that life isn't something you live. It's something you feel. And when you feel something, you do it. And he is completely and exactly right."
"Wow," Taylor said quietly. "Sounds like the two of you really hit it off."
"Jason is special to me. He and I bonded in a way that I've never bonded with anyone before. But it's different. It was like he was put on this earth for the sole purpose of snapping me out of it. For opening a door and shoving me through it. He said things I really needed to hear. And I will be forever grateful to him for that time we spent together. I'm not going to sugarcoat it."
"So you connected with him. You're falling for him, aren't you?"
"Uh, no," she said, thoughtfully. "I guess I'm not putting this clear enough. I mean, he and I are definitely going to keep in touch, but we are by no means in a committed relationship. We may casually date now and then if we cross paths in the future, but nothing serious."
"You guys would make a nice couple," he offered.
Mel was shocked at the statement but chose to keep her composure. She simply smiled and nodded. "I know. But the time isn't right. And it may never be. I have no idea. But I wanted to make something clear here. I understand that you are going through some emotional issues right now. Trust me, I am going through the exact same ones. Do you think I enjoy the fact that you're married? Did you think I was
comfortable seeing you and your wife together last night? Or...or being in your home and seeing the life you built with her? Because I wasn't. Tay, my feelings for you are as strong as they ever were. There are some things in life that you just can't deny, no matter the circumstances. You are my number one. You are my heart. You always have been and you always will be. And we do belong together. I truly believe that we do. And if you were single right now, I would jump in your arms and run away with you without ever looking back. But the reality is that you're in a marriage that you're not ready to get out of."
Taylor was silent. He stared at her in obvious shock and disbelief. Finally, he said, "What if I was ready to get out of my marriage?"
"If I kissed you right now, right this very second, would you feel guilty? Would you be able to go back to your hotel right now and look Natalie in the eye and not feel a single pang of guilt?"
He sighed and twirled his coffee cup in his hands. "I--probably not, no."
"Then you're not ready. Tay, you can tell me how much still love me until you're blue in the face. You really can. But until you're REALLY ready to be with me then it's probably a good idea that we leave those
conversations alone. I absolutely will not help you cheat on your wife. All you really need to know is that all those feelings you say you have for me? I feel the same for you, too. We just need to take it day by day."
Taylor smiled in disbelief and ran his hand through his hair. "Wow. I thought the day I finally heard you say that I would be, like, elated or something. But it actually kinda makes me feel worse."
"Then that's something you're going to have to deal with on your own. All I can do is be here for you. But not in the way you want me to be. Not right now."
"So let me get this straight. You spend one night with some guy you just met and now all of a sudden life is clear. You've found the holy grail. The meaning of life."
"Yeah, Tay, that's pretty much it. I didn't come here to argue with you. Will you stop acting so goddamn jealous? You're the one that's married. You have no fucking right to get pissy with me for spending the
night with a man. Which, by the way, was probably the most magnificent sex I have ever had in my entire life. There! Are you happy? Is that what you wanted to hear??"
Mel was growing louder and louder. Taylor began looking around him in obvious embarrassment. "Mel, okay. Okay, okay. Look you're right, will you just keep it down? You are completely right. What goes on in your personal life is totally none of my business and I'm a hypocrite, okay? Just calm down." As Mel calmed herself and sipped her coffee, Tay continued. "Look, Drew said something to me last night that made me think, too. She more or less told me that I'm being an inconsiderate, selfish lunatic."
"Well, she'd be right," Mel agreed.
"Anyway, I know that I've put a lot of pressure on you lately. And I'm sorry. But you know how I am. Fly by the seat of my pants. I have something on my mind, I say it. I act on it."
"You feel life."
Tay shook his head and tried to hide a smile. "Exactly. But I'm trying. I don't want to put pressure on you. I want us to be able to start over. Get to know each other again. Be rational!"
They both laughed at that. "Yeah, rational would be nice," Mel agreed.
"So can we agree on a truce here? You don't hate me anymore? For real this time?"
Mel shook her head. "Tay, I never hated you."
"Yes, you did. I know you did."
"I was pissed off. For a long time, I was pissed off. But I never truly hated you. I could never hate you. You're everything to me."
Taylor cleared his throat and finished his coffee. "So, uh, I hate to do this, but I gotta be getting back. We have to catch the plane in a few hours. I'm glad we were able to finally get this out in the open."
Mel smiled, "Yeah. Me, too."
They parted ways, Taylor headed to his hotel and Mel headed back to her house. When Mel walked in her front door, Drew was there waiting for her.
"Okay. Spill," Drew demanded.
______________________________
DREW
As Drew watched Mel and Jason leave the club, she looked around at everyone else. Everyone was silent. She
set her sights on Kevin. "Kevin! What the hell is that guy's problem?"
Kevin looked bewildered. "Believe it or not, I've never seen him in a fight before. He really is a good guy. I'm just as surprised as everyone else is."
Taylor's voice was the next voice Drew heard. "Thanks a lot for the back up there, Ike."
Immediately, Drew looked around for Zac. He and Kate were nowhere to be found. Had they missed the entire exchange? Surely not, they'd said bye to Mel. Drew was kind of surprised that Zac hadn't jumped in on the action. If he was anything like he used to be, he was capable of starting his own physical fight with Jason and they would have gone rounds. Zac wasn't exactly known for taking crap and he wasn't afraid to tell you like
it was. Drew instantly shook the visual out of her mind.
"Hey," Ike said to Tay, interrupting Drew's thoughts. "Like I said from the beginning, I'm not in this. If he had started pounding on you, I'd have jumped in. But you were okay, you seemed to be holding your own there."
"Someone had better tell me what in the hell is going on here," Natalie suddenly piped up. "What are you 'out of' Ike? And Tay, what the hell did you do outside? There is absolutely no good that has come out of anything that has happened here tonight. You're making this trust thing very difficult for me!"
Tay looked at her, astonished. "What the hell are you talking about? Trust thing? You practically fell all over yourself when he asked you to dance!"
"I was flattered!"
"You are drunk!"
Natalie shut her mouth for a second to comprehend what was going on around her. Drew noticed she was a little unsteady on her feet. She smiled to herself.
"Listen," she started again. "I am allowed to have my fun. I am allowed to let loose once in awhile. I am in New York City on a Saturday night and I'll be damned if I'm going to let you spoil it. If you don't mind, I would like to continue this little party somewhere else. I am LEAVING!"
At this moment, Zac and Kate approached. "Leaving?" Kate asked. "Already?"
"We're going out. Just us. Like an after party," Natalie told her. "It's time to get the hell out of this godforsaken place."
Kate shot dirty looks all around the board. "Okay," she said to Natalie. "Sounds like a plan." Then she looked up at Nikki expectantly. "Nikki?"
Poor Nikki looked so uncomfortable. She looked from Drew to Kate then finally gave in. "Um, okay. I'm coming. Sorry, Drew."
As Drew accepted Nikki's apology, Ike stood up. "Well I guess I better tag along. Not a good idea to leave three
ladies alone in the middle of the big city." He hugged Drew. "It was so great to see you. Thanks for tonight."
"It was good to see you, too," she said back to him. "Take care of yourself."
"Nat!" Taylor was saying to get his wife's attention as she left the club. "Natalie!" Drew watched as she ignored him.
"Drew," Kevin said from behind her. "Hey, I hate to leave, too, but my date just showed up. Thanks for letting me tag along. And I'm sorry about Jason."
Drew smiled appreciatively. "Thank you. It really wasn't all that bad."
Before she knew it, she found herself alone with Taylor and Zac. Tay let out a breath and sat back down, his head in his hands. Drew sat beside him. "What in the world was tonight about?" she asked him.
"I don't know," he said. He laughed a small laugh. "That seems to be my motto lately. Natalie is so damn pissed. I can't seem to control my actions. I just don't know."
"Tay, you can't just walk back into her life and expect her to just automatically fall at your feet. If that's what you were hoping would happen then you're sadly mistaken."
"I know," he said. "I know. I thought I could handle this friend stuff. Thought I finally had my shit together, but then I saw her tonight and everything just went to shit." He looked up at Zac and then back at Drew. "I don't see how you two handled it."
Zac shifted his weight nervously and Drew blushed. "Let's just say we got our frustrations out early."
Tay smirked at her.
"Well it hasn't been easy on us, either," Drew continued. "Situations like ours are unusual. It's just up to us to decide how we're going to handle them." Drew glanced up and caught Zac's eye. He looked at the floor.
Tay sighed. "I just need to get out of here. Go back to the hotel. Think..."
"You wanna share a cab?" Drew asked.
"No thanks. I need to be alone for a bit. Besides, I'm sure you and Zac have stuff to talk about." As the three of them stood to leave, Tay got Drew's attention. "Drew?"
"Yeah?"
"Where'd the guy come from? What's up with that?"
Drew shrugged. "It was a blind date, pure and simple. First time I ever met him, too."
"Blind date? They act like they've known each other for awhile."
She narrowed her eyes at him. "Tay, she hasn't been on a date since well before her husband died. To be honest I'm surprised at their chemistry, myself. But there's a whole lot you still don't know. If I were you, I'd probably can the whole 'Oh my god I miss you' act and maybe really try to get to know her again. It has been ten years, you know. People change."
Tay stared at her in silence for a moment. "It's that bad, huh?"
"Kinda, yeah."
Outside the club after Taylor left in his cab, Drew and Zac finally found themselves alone. Zac grabbed Drew by the waist and pulled her close. "So how friendly are you feeling?"
To Drew's own astonishment, she felt herself get slightly annoyed by the question and she pulled away. "Not very, actually."
Zac looked at her, confused. "What's the matter?"
"This whole night was absolutely weird. I mean, with your wife there and all the crap that went on. It was all just really awkward. I didn't like it."
Zac shifted his weight nervously. "Well, yeah. I admit, tonight was a little strange."
"It was a mistake. I don't think it's a good idea for us to try to be one big happy family. Trying to force us all into situations we shouldn't be in. I think friends should be friends and family should be family. They don't always need to go together."
"Yeah, but Drew--what are you saying?"
Drew was frustrated. "I mean I don't need to be all 'besties' with your wife. We don't like each other. We never will. Shit, Zac, she hated me before she met me! I'm all for 'let's be friends' and shit, but this is ridiculous."
"Drew, you know how I feel about you. And I think we should use this time wisely while we're alone."
Drew was suddenly realizing that she harbored feelings and resentments she didn't know she had. "Yeah, I know how your dick feels about me, Zac. I have no idea what's going on up here." She motioned to her head.
Zac looked hurt. "I thought we were cool earlier. Where is this coming from?"
"I'm just--I don't know. Too much crap going on, too many emotions. I just need to be alone. Maybe Tay had the right idea tonight."
Suddenly Drew's handbag fell out of her hand and hit the ground, spilling out all of the contents all over the sidewalk. Zac bent down to help her pick it all up. "So when do I see you again?" he asked.
"Whenever I see you, I guess," was her response.
"Drew, come on--"
She hailed a nearby cab and opened the back door. "Just go back and get in bed with your wife." Then she closed the door behind her and the cab took off down the street.
_______________________________________
If I wait for summer to begin
I may never begin myself
If we look to another for our dreams
They may never become our own
There's a story every girl will shape
And a journey every boy must take
Sing it if you know it
Scream it if you feel it
There's nothing standing in your way
Follow along with me
Scream And Be Free
If you're always living for tomorrow
You're gonna miss right now
If you're only looking in the mirror
We'll never see ourselves
Raise your voices
Singing one more song
We will not be here for too long
Raise your voices
Singing my anthem
Make your mark before we're undone
Sing it if you know it
Scream it if you feel it
There's nothing standing in your way
Follow along with me
Scream And Be Free
MEL
Mel and Jason had opted to walk back to Mel's place. He had looked at her shoes and asked if she was sure she wanted to walk. Her response had been that if they found themselves in close confines at the moment, she would have torn his clothes off with no apparent regard for their environment.
He had accepted her answer and now they walked, hand-in-hand, down a quiet street in New York City.
"Look, I'm sorry about back there with Taylor," Jason's deep voice cut through the late night air. "I know he's your friend or whatever and I was kind of out of line. I almost broke his pretty face, though. Seriously. If he'd have kept on with his mouth, I'd have done it."
"Well," Mel said, searching for a response. "I'm sorry for the entire night. I'm sorry you ended up in the middle of all this crazy mess. You didn't deserve that."
"I'll admit it was pretty crazy. I mean, I totally didn't mean to lose my shit and all that, but--there's only so much I'm willing to sit around and watch go down."
"I slapped him, you know."
Jason looked down at her, amused. "You what?"
"That's what happened outside. I slapped him. He really didn't do anything. We were talking and he said some things I wasn't ready to hear. Emotions took over and I slapped him. I kinda didn't mean to, actually..."
Jason chuckled. "Wow. I'm gonna have a lot of fun with you."
Mel smiled up at him flirtatiously. "You have no idea."
The pair walked in silence for a couple more minutes before Mel spoke again. "So...Jason. What's your name?"
He laughed at her. God he was so gorgeous when he laughed. "What do you mean? You just said it."
She smiled. "No, I mean what is your NAME? Like 'I'm Melody Bradshaw, nice to meet you.' What's your name?"
He shook his head in amusement. "My name is Jason Kamealoha."
Slowly, Mel repeated his name. "Kamealoha...Jason Kamealoha...has a nice ring to it. What does it mean?"
Jason challenged her. "Why does it have to have a meaning?"
She suddenly felt embarrassed. "Uh, well, I just figured since--"
"What does Bradshaw mean?"
Mel felt defeated. "Touche."
He laughed and pulled her closer to him. "I'm just kidding with you. Kamealoha means 'the beloved one.'"
She smiled up at him. "That's nice. 'Jason The Beloved One.' I mean it seems a bit pretentious but it's nice."
He smiled at her. "Well then go for it, Bradshaw. Dazzle me."
She shrugged. "I dunno. It's not my maiden name."
"Ohh," he said, nodding in mock understanding. "So then dazzle me with your maiden name."
"Oh it's not nearly as beloved as yours."
He let out a deep, hearty laugh that seemed to echo through the night. She smiled at him. "Try me," he
said.
"It's boring old Banks. That's my maiden name."
Growing more serious, he said to her, "It's not boring. It's a beautiful name."
Mel scrunched her nose up in disgust. "You're a horrible liar."
"I'm completely serious. It's beautiful because it's who you are."
Mel was dumbfounded. She wasn't sure she'd ever heard a more beautiful statement in her entire life. 'I should have married into some damn culture,' she thought to herself.
"Uh, look," Jason said, breaking the silence. "I just want to say that I'm really glad I got to meet you tonight. I mean, aside from all the obvious sexual tension." He smiled at her, deviously. "I don't want you to think that I'm some...player or anything. When I say something, I mean it. My word is very important to me."
Mel smiled. "Well I appreciate that. A lot. As long as we're being honest...you're the first date I've had in a
long time. A really long time. Um, please don't let that scare you off. I swear I'm not some crazy cat lady or something like that."
He smiled at her, that gorgeous, bright smile that made her melt. "I don't think that. I know you've been through a lot."
Startled, Mel stopped dead in her tracks, her hand still in his. She turned to face him. "What do you mean you know I've been through a lot? How much do you know? How do you know?"
"I KNOW," he repeated. "Your friend is pretty talkative."
"Did you--did you know about me before you came over? Is this, like, a charity thing? A pity date?"
"No, no. Nothing like that," he said, pulling her close to him. He held her face in his hands and looked her in the eyes. She was putty in his hands. "I mean, yeah, I did feel a little sorry before we came over, but then I saw you and none of that mattered. I never gave it another thought. I know you felt the fireworks the second we laid eyes on each other." He moved his lips closer to her ear. "I told you already. I'm not in the habit of saying things I don't mean."
He pulled away and she stared up into his eyes. There was meaning in them. Truth. She was instantly calm.
Without another word, she took his hand and they began walking again. Changing the subject, Mel said, "I noticed the tattoo on the inside of your arm earlier. I like it. What is it?"
She saw him glance down at his arm. "Oh, that one is a wave. Represents my mana."
"Your mana?" Mel asked.
"In Hawaiian culture, it is believed that certain objects or places have their own life forces to them. That certain forces and power can be drawn from them. My mana is water. Or the ocean, more specifically. Like I am one with the ocean, for lack of a better term. It's who I am."
"Hm," Mel said. "I don't have any tattoos. I wouldn't even know what kind of tattoo to get."
"That's because you don't know who you are yet."
Mel walked in silence, contemplating. This man was just full of fascinating information. What started out as strictly primal, carnal attraction--which, make no mistake, was still there--had now grown into something else. She saw him as a person now. She liked him.
He broke her silence. "I live in Hawaii, you know. I catch the plane to go back home tomorrow night. I was only in town for the weekend visiting with some buddies. Just, uh, thought you should know..."
"You know," Mel said, ignoring the disappointment she found herself feeling at that statement. "I have to say, I've never really met a Hawaiian with green eyes before. Well, I haven't actually met a lot of Hawaiians, but still. None with green eyes."
He leaned over and said in a half whisper as if telling her a secret, "That's because I'm only half Hawaiian."
She looked up at him. "Oh, really? Well you're just full of surprises."
"You haven't even learned the half of them."
Mel laughed seductively.
Finally at the Brownstone, Mel unlocked the front door and Jason followed her inside. Once inside, she had just dropped her keys in the bowl on the table by the door when Jason wasted no time grabbing her and
planting his second hungry kiss on her lips.
Letting all inhibitions fly out the window, Mel anxiously grabbed at his shirt and pulled it over his head. She gasped and stared in wonder at his bare chest. He was so beautiful in his caramel skin, he was almost untouchable. His arms and torso were carved out about as much a torso could be carved. Complete with six-pack abs, pecs to die for and rolling hills of biceps, Mel found herself in complete sexual overload. He was no longer a mere man. He was her prey.
As she kissed him, her hands quickly felt for the belt of his jeans and nimbly went to work on it. However, before she could get anything accomplished, his large hands suddenly wrapped around both of her wrists.
Caught off guard, Mel's eyes darted to his in protest. Slowly and seductively, he placed her hands at her sides and proceeded to lightly tug the one sleeve of her dress down and squatted low in front of her, gently pulling her dress past her waist and let it fall to her ankles. When she had gotten dressed earlier in the night she had absolutely no idea that she would be having sex tonight, nor did she have the intention. She was now glad that she had opted to wear no underwear.
As she stepped out of her dress, she became immediately aware of her pistol which she had strapped to the inside of her thigh. Once again she had completely forgotten she had it on her and wanted to die of embarrassment as she remembered Taylor freaking out over it when he discovered it on her the previous week. She wanted to crawl into a hole.
She felt the blood rise in her cheeks as she began to apologize. "Oh my god," she said. "I am so sorry." She swiftly began to grab at the strap to remove the gun when, once again, Jason, still squatted in front of her, stopped her hands and placed them back at her sides.
The sight of the gun had absolutely no affect on him. He hadn't even flinched or acted surprised. He took the strap from around her thigh, dropped it in the floor and then took the pistol in his hand. He ran the side of the barrel of the pistol gently up her thigh, then across her abdomen and then slowly up to her stomach. She sucked in her breath in anticipation and her heart raced about ten million miles per second. He then continued to run it between her small breasts and across her shoulder as he stood, running it half way down her arm before gently laying it on the foyer table beside the bowl that contained her keys. Never once breaking eye contact.
It was the most erotic thing she had ever experienced.
He then leaned down and wrapped one arm around her waist letting out a primal, aroused growl as he hoisted her up. She wrapped her legs around his waist as she entangled her hands in his hair and hungrily kissed and
teased his neck.
She hadn't uttered a word to tell him where her room was but miraculously he had found it on the first try. He carried her with ease, through the doorway, slamming the door behind him. Savagely, he laid her down on the bed and began to work on his belt. Once he was fully undressed, she found him just as impressive, if not more, below the waist than he was above.
He repositioned her on the bed and she didn't object. She was so turned on, she allowed him to do whatever he saw fit with her. But not for long. That familiar, predatory instinct was beginning to take over and she was more than ready to show him what she was about.
________________________________________
DREW
Drew was pissed off when she finally came home from the club. She was pissed off at Zac because she felt he was holding back on her. She was pissed off at the fact that she had to go all the way back to the club because she had lost her ID only to find that it was not there and, in turn, had to stand around and file a report for it. Finally, she was pissed at herself for not being able to find the source of her sudden change in mood. She had
wanted nothing but Zac earlier in the night. What the hell had happened?
She walked into the dark Brownstone an entire hour after she had first gotten in her cab to leave. A ride that should have only taken about ten minutes but was disrupted by detours associated with her lost ID.
Drew didn't bother to turn on any lights. She didn't care. She was tired, hurt, and stressed out and all she wanted to do was sleep. She went straight to her room and changed into her favorite pajama pants and her favorite ratty t-shirt. She cleaned the makeup off her face and crawled into bed, setting her phone to a James Taylor playlist to help soothe her to sleep.
It didn't take long for her to doze off. She was obviously exhausted. She had been asleep for about ten minutes when Fire and Rain was interrupted by the sound of her text alert. Sleepily, she looked at her phone and saw a text from Zac. "Come to the door."
She wasn't sure she was reading correctly as her eyes were still asleep. "What?" she texted back.
"Come to the door. Don't want to ring bell or knock in case Mel is asleep."
"She's not even home."
"Come anyway."
Angry as she was, curiosity and astonishment got the best of her. He couldn't possibly be at her house!
She rubbed her eyes and headed to the front door. She hesitated before she opened it. She should text him and tell him to go away, she thought. But she knew better. She knew she couldn't resist him, no matter how
upset she got. She opened the door.
Sure enough, there he stood. "Zac!" she said in a loud whisper. "What the hell are you doing here? How did you find me?"
He smiled slyly at her and flipped her ID in his fingers as if it were one of his drum sticks. "Swiped this when it fell out of your bag."
She snatched it out of his hand. "How dare you! That is so despicable! I had to file a report because it was missing!"
"I'm sorry. I am. But you refused to see me and I found an opportunity so I took it."
"Where's your wife?"
"Still out."
She looked at him skeptically. "Seriously?"
"Seriously! Have I ever lied to you?"
He had a point. Despite everything they had ever been through, present times included, he had never lied to her. She had to give him that.
"Can I please come in?" Zac asked.
Reluctantly, she let him in and he closed the door behind him. Still dark, Drew stepped on an odd piece of fabric under her bare feet. "What the hell? she said, turning on the lamp on the foyer table.
Drew and Zac looked around in shock. "I thought she wasn't home!" Drew said in a loud whisper. She and Zac spied Mel's dress under the foyer table, the strap that held her pistol under Drew's foot, Jason's white t-shirt thrown over the chair across from the foyer table, and Mel's pistol and keys on the table beside her.
They looked at each other wide-eyed. "Holy shit," Zac said. "That's a sex tape I would probably pay to see..."
Drew laughed and hit Zac on the arm. "What?" he said. "I'm not gonna lie, I wouldn't kick him out of MY bed."
She rolled her eyes at him. "Come on," she said. She led him to her bedroom.
Closing the door behind them, Zac's expression turned serious. "Look, Drew. We really do need to talk."
"Okay," Drew said. "Talk."
Zac sighed and sat on the bed beside her. "Um, okay. I'm kind of in a difficult position here. You and I, we've always been...free...we never had a care in the world about anything. We were together and we were happy and that was all that mattered. Right?"
"Right," she agreed.
"Right. Well, I haven't really been that person for a long, long time. I mean I'm married now, I have kids. And...I've never cheated on Kate before. Never even thought about it. Not once. And then you...come back into my life and it's like I'm an entirely different person. A different version of myself. And I miss that person and I miss you and then at the same time I love my wife and--I can't be two different people, but that's how I feel. I feel like I am two completely different people and I don't really know how to get a handle on it. Drew, I don't want to lead you on or make any false promises to you. I can't sit here and say that I'm ever going to leave my wife because I don't know what's going to happen. But the heart wants what the heart wants and
right now the heart wants you. Tonight. Drew, I have nothing to offer you but right now."
Drew sat in silence for a moment. "I understand your situation. The position you're in. I do. And I want to respect it, but the truth is, I feel exactly the same way. I'm trying to figure my feelings out too, but it's so difficult. See, I still live in the moment. When I see you or talk to you I feel like we are the only two people that exist in the world. That's the connection we have and that connection is strong. I can't sit here and tell you
that I'm going to carry on this elicit affair with you, but I can't promise that I won't either. Like you said, the heart wants what the heart wants--"
"I can't stay," Zac said.
"I know."
"You are so sexy right now."
"I look like a train wreck."
"It's fantastic."
And with that, Zac took her face in his hands and kissed her. Drew's heart raced as he laid her down on the
bed and in one swift movement, pulled her pants off of her and tossed them to the side. He removed his own shirt and positioned himself over her, kissing her neck and sliding his hand up her shirt. As he teased her nipple, she moaned with pleasure and began leaving open-mouthed kisses over his neck and shoulder.
Drew's hands drifted until the found the top of his pants and without any trouble, she had his pants unbuttoned and unzipped. As her hands brushed across she could tell that he was more than ready for her.
After they were both undressed, Zac laid Drew back on the bed and he lowered himself between her legs. Grasping the sheet in one hand and a handful of Zac's hair in the other, she arched her back and moaned in ecstasy. She looked down to watch him work and with a quick flick of his tongue she threw her head back on the pillow and moaned louder. He was so damn talented and she was very quickly losing control.
Not ready to come yet, she made him stop. They met each other on their knees in the bed and Drew kissed and teased every part of his body as she had her hand around him below the waist, keeping a tight grip. When she began slowly stroking him, Zac sucked in his breath. "Oh my god," he groaned. "Drew, turn around."
Drew quickly turned around and assumed the position and he entered her from behind. Drew's breathing instantly turned rapid and was turned on even more at the moan Zac released as he realized how tight she was. He started slow with her, enjoying how it felt until Drew was so worked up she decided she didn't have time for it anymore. "Harder," she urged him, watching him from over her shoulder.
Zac did as instructed and they both moaned with pleasure. "Shit, Drew," Zac's breathing was harder and more rapid. "Oh shit."
"Harder," she urged him through clenched teeth. "Do it, don't hold back."
Obliging her, and himself, he took her aggressively until she came and then he followed soon after.
Out of breath, Drew turned over and looked up at Zac. He soon collapsed on top of her and gently kissed her. "We gotta stop meeting like this," Drew said.
Zac smiled. "Do we?"
She smiled back. "You know us."
Suddenly they heard Zac's phone go off. "Shit!" He got out of the bed and looked for his phone. When he found it, he looked at Drew. "It's Kate. They're on their way back to the hotel." With a pained look in his eyes, he said, "God I feel like an asshole, but I really gotta get back."
Surprisingly, Drew found that she didn't mind. For some reason, the idea of Zac as a one night stand pleased her and she wasn't sure why. She sat up in the bed with the sheet wrapped around her. "One of these days we may be able to talk for five minutes after sex."
"I'm so sorry," he said as he buttoned his pants and looked for his shoes. "Drew I--"
"It's okay," she said, smiling. "I get it. I'm just glad I got to have you when I did."
She dressed herself and walked him out of the bedroom and to the front door. He kissed her one last time. "I swear to you I'll call you."
"I know you will. And if you don't, I know where to find you."
He laughed. "Yeah, that's true."
As she watched Zac bound down the front steps, she closed the door behind him and leaned against it, staring into her living room. She spied Mel's dress and Jason's shirt, gathered them up and dropped them in a pile in
front of Mel's bedroom door on the way back to her own.
__________________________________________________
MEL
Mel flipped her long, dark hair back away from her face, biting her bottom lip and enjoying the look on Jason's face as he enjoyed himself. He held her hips tight as she rode him and she rode fast and hard. She couldn't help herself. She was even more turned on at the fact that she found herself in complete and utter control--something that hadn't happened to her in quite some time, besides the act of sex itself.
She could feel herself coming. She hadn't wanted to yet, but she wasn't able to help herself any longer. One more look at Jason and his gorgeous body and it was all over for her. As her moans became more rapid and quick, he began to encourage her in a savage voice that came from deep in his throat. "Mmm, that's it," he
whispered. "Come on. Come on, baby, you got it. That's it..."
And then it was over for her. She collapsed into his neck and groaned her release eagerly into his ear.
She returned the favor and held him down aggressively as she rode him until he came. When it was time, she took his mouth in hers and thrust her tongue into his mouth as she felt him buck underneath her. He growled into her mouth as she kissed him and she didn't break the kiss until his moans subsided.
Catching her breath, Mel rolled off of him and laid there beside him. "Holy shit," Jason said, wiping sweat off his forehead with both of his hands. "That was so hot." He looked over at her and smiled. "I completely underestimated you."
She smiled back, pleased with herself. "I may be little, but I pack a lot of punch. Especially when it comes to
something I want."
He laughed in disbelief. "You know when I first saw you, I was like, 'Yeah, I got this.' But then you go and--damn!"
Mel giggled. "You thought you had what?"
"I don't know. I guess I pegged you for typical."
"Typical? How often does this happen to you."
He smiled at her shyly. It was the first time she had ever seen him blush all night long. "Not often, actually," he said. "Actually, not really at all."
Mel was shocked. She turned her head to get a better look at him. "Really. I mean, for you to look the way you do. You don't have at least two or three women per week?"
"This isn't really my thing."
Mel opened her mouth to protest, but he put a finger over her lips and smiled. "But there's that rare occasion where when sparks fly, you just can't ignore them. And damn if you aren't a little firecracker. I swear I got hard the second you turned that corner. It was the damnest thing. It's not like I was out 'looking to get laid' when Kevin talked me into this date."
"Talked you into it, huh?"
"Well yeah, it was a blind date. How did you feel when you found out about it?"
He had a point. "Well you got me there."
Jason grinned at her and turned over, pulling her close to him. "You know what else I got?" he whispered. He glanced down his body and back at her.
"No fucking way," she smiled.
He slid his fingers between her legs and began talking dirty into her ear as they prepared to go for round two.
_________________________________________
Mel awoke to the sunlight invading her room. She didn't know what time it was and she didn't really care. She lay there on her side for a moment and dared not to stir because she knew that when she turned over, Jason would already be gone and last night would have been nothing more than a dream.
After a moment or two, she did stir as a leg cramp started to kick in. She turned over to reach for her other pillow when, to her shock, she found Jason there sound asleep.
She was surprised to see him and took a minute to study him like the work of art that he was. How a man like that had ever given her the time of day was beyond her. He slept on his back, the sunlight shining on his rich, Hawaiian skin, which seemed to glow against the white pillows and white covers she kept on her bed. One of his muscular arms rested behind his head, revealing another small, black tattoo hidden under his bicep. His
head faced opposite from her and his long brown hair subtly splayed out against the pillow. He looked so peaceful it was like witnessing a dream.
Not wanting to wake him, Mel gently let herself out of bed. She tiptoed to her bathroom and looked in the mirror at the horror before her. She thanked god above that she was able to escape before Jason woke to this
monstrosity. She ran a brush through her tangled mane and wiped excess makeup off of her face that had gone astray during their wild night. She brushed her teeth and finished freshening herself up.
She had come through the doorway and back into her bedroom and had begun silently rifling through some clothes to find something to throw on, when she heard Jason's sleepy voice from across the room. "Hey, what are you doing?"
She looked over at him as he sat up in the bed, naked from the waist up, the rest of him covered by the white comforter. 'Goddamn,' she thought. 'He even wakes up sexy.' Was there anything about him that didn't turn her on?
"Uh, I was just gonna put something on real quick."
"No, no," he said. "Come back here. Don't put anything on."
She obeyed and crawled back under the covers with him. He wrapped both of his arms around her and pulled her close. They lay like that for about a minute when Mel said, "I didn't peg you for the cuddling type."
"Are you kidding, I'm a teddy bear."
"You're something," she said, jokingly.
He answered quietly. "So are you."
Mel turned over so she could be face to face with him. They lay on their sides, looking at each other. She moved a strand of hair away from his face. "I hate that you have to go back to Hawaii so soon."
"I don't HAVE to do anything," he responded. "I'm a free man. But I am kind of homesick and I want to get some time in before I take off again."
Mel sighed in agreement. "Yeah. I just went home recently, too. Didn't realize how much I missed it until I was there."
"Where is home for you?"
"Tulsa, Oklahoma."
He smiled. "Oh, a Midwest girl, huh? Should have known you weren't a true city girl."
"Just a wannabe," she said.
"So was your ex there? When you went back home, I mean?"
"Unfortunately. There are just some things that are better left in the past but they just won't seem to go away in the present."
"Sometimes that's when you know if it's meant to be," Jason said softly.
Startled by the statement, Mel stared at him. "Huh?"
He propped his head up on his hand and looked down at her. "Um, listen, I'm not really looking for a relationship. I mean, work is really piling on right now. I have a couple of films and a couple of TV shows that I have to do some work on. I'm booked up solid for the next year and a half, at least. I can't handle the commitment right now. I hate it, but I love what I do."
She smiled softly at him. "Trust me, I'm not stranger to that. It's okay."
"Mel, I don't want to hurt you."
"I'm not hurt. The truth is, I'm not sure if I'm ready for one, either. I mean, you're amazing and I really like you, but--I'm not exactly in a place to be in a commitment myself."
"You know, we came into each other's lives for a reason," he said. "Everything happens for a reason. The reason may not be apparent for years down the road, but it's there."
She smiled. "I could believe that. What do you think my reason for coming into your life is?"
He looked in her eyes and studied her face, caressing her arm lightly. "I don't really know, yet. I know virtually nothing about you but at the same time I feel like I know your soul. It's kind of strange, actually. I feel calm and comfortable around you. Like I can be myself, you know? But I can't really answer your question right now." He smiled. "Give it some time and get back to me."
Mel was amused. "Get back to you, huh? So I'll hear from you again? This isn't some love me and leave me situation?"
Jason laughed. "Dammit, woman. I can't decide if you're paranoid or if you're challenging me. Of course I want to stay in touch with you. We can't have a connection like ours and lose touch. Are you crazy?"
She giggled. "I'm sorry. I guess I'm just one of those people who just can't live their lives with unanswered questions."
"Life isn't something you live," he said. "Life is something you feel. If you aren't doing what you feel is right, how are you living? This time we spent? That was right for us, in the moment. You can't let your past or what your future might hold dictate your right now. If you feel it, do it. That's the only way you'll ever truly know."
Mel stared at him in awe. "Know what?"
"Everything."
His words hit her like a ton of bricks and Taylor instantly entered her mind. Jason was right. She had spent so much time resisting Tay that she never paid attention to her own feelings or what she wanted. For her to find emotional relief she had to pinpoint what she truly wanted, difficult as it may be to attain.
Desperate to push Tay out of her mind for the time being, she kissed Jason. Returning her kiss, he moved himself on top of her and kissed her deeper. After a couple of minutes, she stopped kissing him. She smiled at him. "So, you've known me for embarrassingly less than 24 hours now," she said. "Judging by what little bit you know, what do you think my mana is?"
Jason laughed lightly. "I can't tell you what your mana is. Nobody can. That's personal to you."
"Well I don't know much about mana and I'm not Hawaiian, so. IF you could tell what my mana was, what would it be?"
"Music," he said. He didn't think about it. He didn't hesitate. It rolled right off his tongue.
Mel was startled. Her entire life had revolved around music, in more ways than one. She spent her entire life singing, then the Hansons came along and now she was a music critic. It was a little-known fact that she
even wrote a few songs as well. Her life revolved around music. For him to say music was her mana without ever knowing any of this about her absolutely stunned her. She had no idea what to say.
Finally, she managed to choke out, "Uh, can music be mana?"
"I don't see why not. Mana is like a spiritual energy that lives in something. It could be anything."
"Why music?" she prompted.
"Because that's what I feel when I'm with you. Music is dynamic. It's diverse. It's full of many different meanings. Music makes you feel things. Different things. Everything. Music determines who you are. You are music."
She must have had one hell of an expression on her face because Jason started laughing. "Well I'm no expert," he said. "You can tell me to fuck off or whatever, it's okay."
"Did you know I'm a music critic?" she whispered, barely able to get it out.
He immediately shut up and looked in her eyes.
"I'm a music critic," she repeated. "I review music. All kinds. For a living."
Suddenly, she attacked him. She didn't know what it was. She couldn't stop herself, the urge took over and she absolutely had to have him. Right there and now, as the morning sunlight flooded into her room.
As urgently as she had kissed him, he stopped her and pushed her away. "Wait, wait," he said.
"No..."
He brought his face closer to hers. He spoke to her quietly. Gently. "I want to take my time with you this time. To really pay attention to all that there is of you. Please take this slow with me."
She heard herself gasp a little. She didn't really care what he said at this moment, she just wanted him any way she could get him. She gave in to him without a fight.
____________________________________
After they made love for the last time---well, as they made love for the first time, as making love was hardly how you would describe the night before--Jason used her shower and then prepared to leave. "I
actually didn't mean to spend the night," he said. "But I'm glad I did."
Mel smiled, tying her robe around her. "I'm so sorry you didn't get much sleep. I know it's going to be brutal having to catch that flight with so little rest."
"It's not a problem," he smiled. "I'm so used to it. I sleep like a baby when I fly.
They exchanged contact information and he kissed her one last time, wrapping his arms around her tightly. "I am so glad you ended up as my date last night," she said. "I'm going to miss you."
"Me, too," he said. "Don't be a stranger. And, uh, maybe...maybe when my work lets up some next year and if we're both still single...maybe we could try to take this a step further."
She smiled. "We'll see. Only time will tell."
She shut the door behind her when he left and leaned against it and sighed. She spotted Drew looking at her expectantly from across the room. Mel giggled at her. "Did you know that you're the best friend in the world? Like ever?"
Drew was amused. "Well, then. Someone is perky this morning."
Mel smiled. "That was the best sex I have ever had in my entire life. Ever. And not just because I haven't had sex in...god I don't even want to say it. It was the BEST. All. Three. Times."
Drew was beside herself. "Three times?? Holy shit! Details!"
"Later," Mel begged. "I desperately need a nap."
"Mel! Come on!" Drew said.
Mel walked past her and into her bedroom. She didn't even take off her robe before getting into bed. She didn't realize how exhausted she was until that moment. She was asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow.
She guessed she must have been asleep for a little over an hour when her cell phone rang. She wanted to ignore it but then she thought it might have been Jason, so she fished it out of her handbag on her night stand and let her eyes adjust to the caller ID. She didn't know how to feel about the number she saw on the screen. It was Taylor.
Reluctantly, she answered. "Hello?"
"Hey, Mel, meet me for coffee."
Mel was instantly annoyed. "Well good morning to you, too, I wasn't asleep or anything. Just sitting here waiting for you to call."
"Shit, Mel, I'm sorry. That was rude of me. Please meet me for coffee."
"Tay," Mel groaned. "I need to sleep."
"Please. I only have a few hours."
Mel sighed and gave in. "Fine," she said. "Give me twenty minutes."
Hastily Mel showered and threw on a pair of skinny jeans, a t-shirt, and a pair of gray, suede, stiletto, ankle boots. At her vanity she threw her hair on top of her head in a messy mass. Instinctively, she reached into her small keepsake box and retrieved the necklace that held her wedding rings and began to put it around her neck.
Ready to clasp the necklace, she stopped and stared at them through the mirror as they laid on her chest. She remembered what Jason had said. "Don't let your past or what your future may hold dictate your right
now." He had said that you feel life, you don't live it. At that moment, in her right now, she felt like she would be okay without her wedding rings. She would never forget John, and she would always love him, but now was the time to finally let him go. It was time to open her eyes with a fresh outlook on life. Time to start over.
It dawned on her. That was the reason Jason had come into her life.
Finally, she threw on a hoodie and a pair of large sunglasses to hide her exhausted eyes and headed for the door. On the foyer table she spied her pistol. She reached for it and then stopped herself. Was it really that necessary to have it on her after all? She opted to leave it alone and went out the door.
Mel arrived at Lavazza in Union Square five minutes late. Taylor was waiting for her on the corner. Her heart skipped a beat when she saw him. After last night, and this morning, she seemed to see him in a whole
different light. It was almost as if her entire outlook on life had changed. Like she saw him through brand new eyes. She felt liberated.
"Hey," Tay said, nervously. "Thanks for meeting me."
"Where's Natalie?" Mel asked.
"Uh, asleep. She had a pretty rough night last night."
Mel simply nodded in agreement.
"So, uh, I haven't ordered yet. Thought I'd wait on you."
Mel scoffed. "Oh, so we're actually having coffee."
Tay narrowed his eye at her. "I asked you to meet me for coffee. What the hell else are we gonna do?"
Mel didn't answer him. Instead she followed him inside the coffee shop in silence.
"What are you having?" he asked her when they got to the counter.
"Oh it's okay. I'll get it."
He acted annoyed. "Mel. Why are you constantly being so difficult? Just let me buy you a damn cup of coffee. Black, right?" he said as he turned back to the counter and placed the order.
Mel couldn't help but smile to herself when his back was turned. Back when they were together before she didn't even drink coffee. Now he had hit her preference right on the head without ever even knowing. She knew it seemed kind of trivial, but it touched her nonetheless.
They picked a table outside and sat across from each other. "Listen, Mel," Taylor started. "I want to apologize for last night. The whole night was just completely insane and pretty much an all-round bad idea. "I kinda lost my head a little bit. And I'm sorry."
"I'm not," she said.
He looked surprised. "You're not?"
"Tay, what has happened in the past--what, 14 hours?--has probably been the closest thing to a spiritual experience that I have ever had."
He furrowed his brow. "This is totally not the direction I expected this conversation to go in."
"Jason opened my eyes to a lot. Made me see things in an entirely different light."
Tay rubbed his face. "I really didn't want to talk about the Incredible Hulk today."
Mel sipped her coffee and scowled at him through her sunglasses. "Just shut up and listen. It's not even like that--"
"Did you sleep with him?"
"Tay!"
"Okay, okay. I'm sorry. None of my business."
"Anyway, he said some things to me that at first I thought were just sweet sentiments and such but after I got to thinking about it, it was like my head suddenly cleared and I could see the light," she said matter-of-factly, her voice still groggy from lack of sleep. "Basically, life is too short to dwell and worry. It is. I have spent so much time, maybe even too much time, grieving over John and wallowing in my own self-pity. I miss him and I always will. This morning is the first morning I have ever left my house without my wedding rings. Or my pistol. And it's weird and it's gonna take some getting used to, but it's right. It feels right. He told me that life isn't something you live. It's something you feel. And when you feel something, you do it. And he is completely and exactly right."
"Wow," Taylor said quietly. "Sounds like the two of you really hit it off."
"Jason is special to me. He and I bonded in a way that I've never bonded with anyone before. But it's different. It was like he was put on this earth for the sole purpose of snapping me out of it. For opening a door and shoving me through it. He said things I really needed to hear. And I will be forever grateful to him for that time we spent together. I'm not going to sugarcoat it."
"So you connected with him. You're falling for him, aren't you?"
"Uh, no," she said, thoughtfully. "I guess I'm not putting this clear enough. I mean, he and I are definitely going to keep in touch, but we are by no means in a committed relationship. We may casually date now and then if we cross paths in the future, but nothing serious."
"You guys would make a nice couple," he offered.
Mel was shocked at the statement but chose to keep her composure. She simply smiled and nodded. "I know. But the time isn't right. And it may never be. I have no idea. But I wanted to make something clear here. I understand that you are going through some emotional issues right now. Trust me, I am going through the exact same ones. Do you think I enjoy the fact that you're married? Did you think I was
comfortable seeing you and your wife together last night? Or...or being in your home and seeing the life you built with her? Because I wasn't. Tay, my feelings for you are as strong as they ever were. There are some things in life that you just can't deny, no matter the circumstances. You are my number one. You are my heart. You always have been and you always will be. And we do belong together. I truly believe that we do. And if you were single right now, I would jump in your arms and run away with you without ever looking back. But the reality is that you're in a marriage that you're not ready to get out of."
Taylor was silent. He stared at her in obvious shock and disbelief. Finally, he said, "What if I was ready to get out of my marriage?"
"If I kissed you right now, right this very second, would you feel guilty? Would you be able to go back to your hotel right now and look Natalie in the eye and not feel a single pang of guilt?"
He sighed and twirled his coffee cup in his hands. "I--probably not, no."
"Then you're not ready. Tay, you can tell me how much still love me until you're blue in the face. You really can. But until you're REALLY ready to be with me then it's probably a good idea that we leave those
conversations alone. I absolutely will not help you cheat on your wife. All you really need to know is that all those feelings you say you have for me? I feel the same for you, too. We just need to take it day by day."
Taylor smiled in disbelief and ran his hand through his hair. "Wow. I thought the day I finally heard you say that I would be, like, elated or something. But it actually kinda makes me feel worse."
"Then that's something you're going to have to deal with on your own. All I can do is be here for you. But not in the way you want me to be. Not right now."
"So let me get this straight. You spend one night with some guy you just met and now all of a sudden life is clear. You've found the holy grail. The meaning of life."
"Yeah, Tay, that's pretty much it. I didn't come here to argue with you. Will you stop acting so goddamn jealous? You're the one that's married. You have no fucking right to get pissy with me for spending the
night with a man. Which, by the way, was probably the most magnificent sex I have ever had in my entire life. There! Are you happy? Is that what you wanted to hear??"
Mel was growing louder and louder. Taylor began looking around him in obvious embarrassment. "Mel, okay. Okay, okay. Look you're right, will you just keep it down? You are completely right. What goes on in your personal life is totally none of my business and I'm a hypocrite, okay? Just calm down." As Mel calmed herself and sipped her coffee, Tay continued. "Look, Drew said something to me last night that made me think, too. She more or less told me that I'm being an inconsiderate, selfish lunatic."
"Well, she'd be right," Mel agreed.
"Anyway, I know that I've put a lot of pressure on you lately. And I'm sorry. But you know how I am. Fly by the seat of my pants. I have something on my mind, I say it. I act on it."
"You feel life."
Tay shook his head and tried to hide a smile. "Exactly. But I'm trying. I don't want to put pressure on you. I want us to be able to start over. Get to know each other again. Be rational!"
They both laughed at that. "Yeah, rational would be nice," Mel agreed.
"So can we agree on a truce here? You don't hate me anymore? For real this time?"
Mel shook her head. "Tay, I never hated you."
"Yes, you did. I know you did."
"I was pissed off. For a long time, I was pissed off. But I never truly hated you. I could never hate you. You're everything to me."
Taylor cleared his throat and finished his coffee. "So, uh, I hate to do this, but I gotta be getting back. We have to catch the plane in a few hours. I'm glad we were able to finally get this out in the open."
Mel smiled, "Yeah. Me, too."
They parted ways, Taylor headed to his hotel and Mel headed back to her house. When Mel walked in her front door, Drew was there waiting for her.
"Okay. Spill," Drew demanded.
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